Saying Good-Bye to a Good Man

There is nothing sadder than the sound of Taps at a military burial. Last Wednesday, a week ago, we said good-bye to a good man, Charles Lewis Butler. The funeral was at 10am. My brother Bobby came over to watch Adam as my Mom had to go with my Dad for an MRI (OK, we know how that turned out) and we took Abbey. We went over to Nelson Funeral Home and sat near the front. But not long into the service, Miss Abigail had to be taken out in the hall. She was fussing but as long as I walked her around, she did OK. I could still hear and see...I was sorry that I had to leave Todd, though.

Both Todd and I liked when the pastor said something to the effect of a measure of a man is not how many hours he spends in a church, but his own relationship with God. And then our nephew Patrick, who is 27ish and autistic spoke. He talked about how his favorite memory was...when the week before he and his dad helped Charlie go to the bathroom. Yep. You read right. Todd said he thought part of Patrick's condition was that he couldn't discern between recent and favorite...hmm...he said the word pee more than once!

We drove in the funeral procession to Peck's cemetery...with one of the Butler trucks joining us on the way (yet another form of controversy...apparently to some it was tacky. I don't get it...!) We stood at the foot of the grave under the tent, Abbey content in her Daddy's arms. There were retired marines to do the gun salute (15 shots ...Todd has one of the bullets). Two soldiers conducted the folding of the flag and presenting it to Kathy. But when they played taps, I couldn't help myself. It was so sad...hard to see someone whom I had hugged only a week before before me to be buried. I felt so sad for Todd and his family, thinking at the time how hard it must be to say good-bye to one's father. I cried.

The weather was perfect, a little sunny for Abbey's taste as some of the women in the extended family fussed over her (she loves it...such princess...). I didn't take photos as I wasn't sure it was appropriate, but the images are burned in my brain of Kathy sitting with family behind her taking the flag...of Todd holding Abbey as he watched them honor his father...of my sister-in-law Missie crying, looking so sad.

I titled this appropriately because if anyone had to ask me to describe Todd's father, I would say he was a good man...that's what pops in my head. He loved his family and adored Todd and our children...he was looking out for people even to the end.

He will be missed...Adam's been getting his train whistle off his dresser all week..his grandpa gave it to him before he was born...maybe he knows somehow....