Next Chapter

A couple months ago I wrote about starting a new phase in my life.  And I was going to kick it off by painting my kitchen.

Then I found out I was expecting Baby Butler #3.  It's been a whirlwind of nauseousness and exhaustion since, peppered with helping Adam adjust to school and working on Abbey's strong will.

I won't be painting this fall after all.  The paint chips are taped to the wall and I had it narrowed down.  Nothing exciting; some shade of beige really.  Stuck with the awful baby blue, cock wallpaper border and stained ceiling for now.  But this chapter started with something other than a paintbrush...it is starting with another member of our family.  And this time next year, my life will be full with two kids in some type of school and a new baby.

We saw this baby yesterday on an ultrasound.  Checking on me because I'm of ADVANCED MATERNAL AGE and my thyroid issues (and I am currently on a dosage of hormone replacement that would kill me sans baby inside!). I didn't expect it to be so active at just under 12 weeks.  But it was dancing.  Really just having the time of it's 7.7cm life.  I felt a bit of a weight life.  All my worries about handling three kids, helping Adam and Abbey and wondering if something was wrong with this child...well they didn't just go away but they found more of a proper place.

People have asked me if we are going to move now.  Well, we just bought this cottage.  So we are saving up again.  We figure we have over a year.  Baby will bunk with us.  The kids' rooms are tiny and Abbey is such a bad sleeper we could never put her in with Adam.  Sometimes I stress about it but mostly I remind myself that if this is the biggest issue in my life, I'm doing pretty well.

I will admit when I wrote a couple of months ago about moving forward, I had kind of started to write off having another kid.  I'm tired and old.  But this was meant to be, just like our Adam and Abbey.  And if this baby can dance a happy jig already, then it's clear it will only bring amazing things to this family.

But this is it.  Momma shop is closed.