Nap Wars

I wish I had a picture of the image in my head... Adam in my arms, like a baby, gently sleeping while I rocked him. Looking so much like his father and me and his sister in a rare moment of calm. His long eyelashes (Abbey will probably be jealous) and his dirty blond curls all over...his mouth open just a little...his perfect pale skin... This is not something I've seen in months. And even as an infant, these moments have been rare as Adam has always struggled with following asleep unless he is alone. Last summer, I would have to hold him in my arms until he fall asleep, but it usually accompanied him crying and smacking me to keep himself up.

Every few months, Adam and I have an installment of nap wars. He hates to go to sleep and miss anything. We've got him pretty well trained at night, but if we go off schedule too many days in a row, even that becomes a struggle for a few days.

Nap wars can start if Adam's needs are changing, if I've messed up his schedule too much or ....just because he's Adam. This used to make me very anxious because I know my son...without his nap, he is miserable. And going to sleep at night becomes hard for him if he's overtired. But I realized the last time there was a pattern....that this happens every couple of months and I just have to re-register his needs and spend a few hard days forcing him back on track.

The last couple of days, I tried an old strategy...let him stay in for an hour, take him out for an hour and put him back in....but he seemed to realize if he just held out he'd be rescued. He didn't cry...just play.

I've tried putting him in later, but it didn't help. Today, I pulled an old trick and after a half hour I went into his room and held him and rocked him...expecting resistance...but, it may sound awful, but sometimes both my kids need a little cry to settle down. It breaks my heart if they're alone, but if I'm holding them, I can see they just need to get it out.

But I didn't get the reaction I expected. A few tears and within ten minutes, my little boy was asleep in my arms for the first time in months (except when he was sick). A moment I wanted to hold onto....but I knew if I didn't put him in his crib, he could wake up....so I Let Him Go....

The Week of March 8th

On Tuesday, March 9th, we went to Azteca with Todd's brother Chuck and his wife Missy. Adam was in a rotten mood to begin with, so when I walked in and saw that the table they had saved was right in the doorway, I immediately suspected we might become the center of attention between Adam's impending stormy mood and Abbey being a day shy of two weeks old. Add to that that Adam has been scared of his uncle as of late (I'm suspecting it's his glasses and moustache)...but after a few fits, mostly about holding his cup himself as he sucked on the straw with his new-found skills, he settled in. He was starving and ate a lot. By the end of dinner, Miss Abbey had had enough and allowed Daddy and Aunt Missy to comfort her before she made it clear she wanted food!


On Wednesday, March 10th, Jackie and Quinten came by. Jackie loves the babies and Q...loved getting his little partner in crime Adam going....I made the mistake of telling him not to open a door and close it in front of Adam because "he'll have a fit." The rest of the visit involved Q saying "Why will he have a fit?" and "I want Adam to have a fit" until Jackie threatened to put him into time -out.

And when I took him upstairs to see Orrie because he asked, he wanted him to talk....so on the way out Orrie obliged by saying SHUT UP. Q's eyes got big and said WHAT did he say?? Clearly impressed that our bird was saying "naughty" things....thanks to both me and Todd telling the bird off when it gets to loud!!

Later that night, Todd's friend Judy stopped by to visit Miss Abigail. I like Judy, she's nice and she's Italian :). I had been trying a new recipe...Beef Stroganoff...but by the end of the night, it was a disgusting mess glopped to the pan with everything going on. So I'll be trying it again soon...

On Thursday, March 11th, Melissa came by....she's the auntie that looooves kids but swears up and down she's NEVER pushing one out of herself (can't say as I totally blame her!). Abbey slept in her arms...and Adam got another "sucker" to take him for a walk :) Always nice to see Melissa and catch-up...she was a BIG part of my life at SUNY Oswego (the 2nd time around!!) and she's the kind of friend it doesn't matter how long it's been, we can always talk like no time had passed at all :)

Adam is 17 Months?

Most mornings and nights, Adam will accompany me (or Todd if he happens to do it) upstairs to take care of the bird, Orrie. All I have to say is Do you want to go take care of Orrie and he's waddling his little legs to the door to our room which has the door to the upstairs.

Walking up and down the stairs is a passion for my son and he is full of pride as he crawls up on his own and walks down holding the railing and Mommy's hand.

Today, he seemed so old as he immediately walked up to Orrie's cage and promptly pulled the cover off as he has seen his parents do so many times. He almost got it off himself.

What cracks me up the most about Adam and that bird is that Orrie is clearly jealous of him and squaks and postures...meanwhile Adam, child of no fear, walks right up to the cage. Even using his addorable affectionate voice saying "Deeee".

And, meanwhile, I've been getting Adam kisses for the last week or so. He refused the first few weeks Abigail was home, but I've gotten kisses like 4 days! The first time, i sat on the floor with him in the dining room to play with his barn, something I USED to do all the time...he sat on my knee and kissed me like 5 times. This summer, for the first time, i got three kisses when I got him out of bed while we were doing our daily ritual of looking out the window.

Oh, and he can swipe things off the counter now, climb on all furniture and open the toilet lid to myself. *sigh" whoever invented the term "childproof" didn't have my son!!!

Abigail's 4 Weeks Old!

Today was Abbey's 4 week exam...she slept through most of it..even the thermometer up her butt! She is 21 1/4 inches and 10 lbs 6 oz. Healthy all-around...

But she's not the sleepy little newborn she was a few weeks ago. Yes, she still does sleep well when she wants to. But she has found her voice when she's awake and will no longer tolerate sitting for an our in her papasan chair while Adam gets the attention. :) She's still fairly laid back and pretty patients, but she's definetly showing some personality.

Also, she has some days were she has a hard time burping...those days she can only eat a little before she gets a belly ache. Of course, her worst day was the day Adam was soooo sick.

She gets up twice in the night usually, but sleeps well when she is asleep.

And her eyes look blue still.....we'll see! But def not the deep brown of Adam's.

Adam's Bath

Adam has always loved his bath-y. Something I do with him every night...I loathe to admit he was one before I gave up sitting him in little plastic blue bath tub and gave him the freedom of the tub (though he had a preview when we traveled to Maine in July!). That opened a whole new world for him! (The pic is of him, just a few months old, happy after his bath-y!)

Every night we wash his hair...Adam hates having his hair rinsed, but has learned how to deal with it (it helps when I tell him just one more time..)...we read The Rainbow Fish (I bought a new bath book but he still picks that one) in which every single night without fail, he grins when I read the first line.

On occasion he does take a shower with Daddy...and he always hated the water on his face...but has gotten better with it and Daddy, of course, finds a way to make him laugh.

(He went to the Scriba public pool this past summer and liked it cautiously...but had second thoughts about getting his head wet, though he let Bethany hold him :)

A week and a half ago, I bought this foam letters that stick to the bathtub wall when they're wet to use the night Todd was in Indiana...and he LOVED them. Now, mommy has to hang them up with him and say each one.


But earlier this week, we learned HOW much he loves his bath. I said to him something to the effect of let's eat and then we'll do our bath. He immediately dropped what he was doing and ran to the shut bathroom door and started pushing on it with all his might making grunting noises like he was exerting great effort. He started going "EH EH EH". He was not pleased when he had to wait until we ate.

Adam did something similar the next night, teaching me that I cannot say that "b" word unless I mean it anymore than than the other "b" word (bottle, ba, ba-ba).

Adam's Painful Weekend

Saturday morning Adam woke up so sick. Not his stomach; can't be sure what...I just know the poor kid was crying non-stop and didn't even have the energy to stand up. He laid on me watching Shrek, whimpering and crying on and off...his Daddy got him a bottle and he just..hugged it for a while until I offered it to him and he drank it here and there. I put him back for a nap an hour later as he seemed so sleepy and he would fall asleep and whimper every few minutes...I tried to give him a bath because he felt so sweaty, but he sat there and cried in his bubbles, something he usually loves so much...he only calmed down a little when I picked him up and hugged him. This was not like Adam. He needed to be hugged all morning and would cry on and off. Finally got him to walk as I wanted to be sure it wasn't his legs hurting him, pressed on his belly to make sure it wasn't there. We just knew he was in pain as he didn't even have a fever.

He was somewhat better in the evening and a lot better today, although not a hundred percent. Best guess is some sort of headache or ear ache. We were just so happy to see him feeling better. We had never seen him so sick and so sad. I'm grateful no matter how tired I am from being kept up most of the week by both my kids, that they are essentially pretty healthy.

It definitely took a toll on me this weekend to see him so sick and feel like I couldn't do anything about it...I hope he's all better when he wakes up!

Their First Kiss

On Wednesday, Adam shocked me when he...kissed Abbey. He generally is jealous of her when I'm holding her and protective of her when she's crying. But Adam doles out kisses only when he really feels like it. Sometimes, he'll let you kiss him and on occasion he'll kiss you when you ask. Both are special occasions...but for him to bestow a kiss means a lot! He was standing in front of the chair in the living room where I was sitting with Abbey, watching School House rock while I feed her (keeps him from whining and otherwise throwing objects my way which occasionally seemed aimed at his sister's head.

I picked her up and kind of zoomed her towards him..."Abbey's getting you!" I said. "Your sister is kissing you!" I did this three times and made kissy noises, expecting nothing. He started to smile the second time...then the fourth time, he leaned over opened his cute mouth and kissed her smack on the forehead. I was so excited I called Todd right there.

And...he did the exact same thing yesterday when I was doing the 5ish feeding! So, he does like her...secretly more than me I wonder??? I don't get kisses two days in a row!!!!

As for Abigail...while, like most things, she took it in stride...happy to be held and "shook" about...ha you know what I mean!

Sunday, March 6...Abbey Hits Canale's

I told Todd that Saturday that we had been in the house for over a week...and we needed to get out. He suggested dinner...and at first we were thinking Azteca, but on our way Todd said maybe Canale's...it's where we had our first date and was the first place Adam went out to dinner...and we figured at 5pm, it wouldn't be too crowded. I thought it was a great idea...I love nostaligic tradition :)

So...it was packed. We were lucky there was an empty table. Our neighbors Erin & Tomo were in the booth across from us on a date night away from their four kids...I was exhausted but happy to be out!

A waitress brought us bread and butter and almost took Abbey out, who was in her carseat sleeping in a chair. I guess she didn't notice, 'cause she almost brained our daughter with that butter dish!

Adam sat between us on a corner and behaved pretty well...he finally figured out how to use a straw and one of us had to hold his cup down all night while he drank water. The only thing he would eat...was bread. Guess he was so full on water, he didn't have a taste for anything else!

I told Todd for being so busy, the service was quick...and he said, nah it's not that quick it's just the company you're in...of course referring to himself as just so fun to be with :)

Abbey slept until the end. Then, of course, they didn't bring the check. She started yelling and Adam joined in sympathy. I finally went and asked for the check...and we tried to get our two kids out in cramped quarters...earning a dirty look from the woman directly behind Adam. Abbey made a cruise by so Tomo could meet her and Todd took them to the car while I paid. All in all, it went well.

I didn't like the Rose sauce I tried, but hey, I was trying something new...hoping it would be like our wedding pasta!!

It was a simple dinner out...but I will always remember it as the first time we went out as a family...I felt really content and happy.

And I forgot my camera! Took a photo with my phone; will try to post it :)

Adam's Sick

Adam's sick this week...his temperature was 102 yesterday and for a kid who never gets a temperature, it was enough where we took him to the doctor...his got the flu...doing better today.

He had woke up Saturday night after his dad got home from Indiana and tossed his cookies, but we weren't sure what was wrong with him as he sometimes does that when he's all worked up at night. Between him getting up twice and Abbey three times, I was exhausted on Sunday. Todd did get up with him, but people kept stopping by all day...and by 10:30pm I was dead.

On Monday, Todd met us at Wade's for breakfast and Adam didn't eat much but was very happy. Then, as we were watching Shrek and drinking his bottle, the projectile stinky vomit came...mmm...mm...

And yesterday, Tuesday morning, he threw up one piece of cereal...and yesterday morning was tough as he kept crying, especially when he wanted to lie in my lap, but I was feeding Abbey. That was hard.

Doctor checked his ears, declared it the flu and said to keep giving him the formula he had been drinking successfully.

Today, he did keep down a piece of bread!

And I have a killer headache.

Friday, March 5....Tammy Part 2

Tammy came back on Friday...I asked her to pick me up a club sandwhich from the Press Box :)

Adam didn't follow his nap time, so he had yet to go to sleep when she got here at one-ish..I was going to have her take him for a walk again, but as we were sitting at the dining room table, Adam brought in his monkey-blankey to me, making it apparent he wanted to watch Shrek and take his nap.

So both kids were sleeping...and I left the house! I rarely leave my kids...and to leave a newborn? Well, maybe I'm a little attached :) I went to Wal-mart, rushing around in case Abbey woke up. But she didn't.

I had had plans for a big "photo shoot" with Tammy's fancy professional grade television, but Abbey was starving and well, cooperating wasn't in her best interest...of course, some cute pics were taken after a "snack" but many of them she was making funny kissy faces 'cause she wanted to eat!!

Tammy had to go get to Driver's Village for an oil change, but I'm sure we'll get a lifetime of "photo shoots" in!!!!

Nice to see her...and Adam loves her! (And the wind-up bunnies she brought...sadly, he wound them up to their death :)

Thursday, March 4...Tammy Visits

Tammy was going to try and visit the Thursday/Friday before (her days off) but the blizzard of 2010 kept her in Albany.

She was going to drive up and be here by lunch...I had the fab idea to ask her to stop and pick up Pastabilities (Fab homemade pasta/sauces in armory square LOVE the spicy hot oil!). Turns out there was a misunderstanding..between my exhaustion (still haven't slept in like a month now) and hers (guess she stayed up till 4am knitting Abigail's beautiful blanket and hat!) and she thought I said I was going to MEET her in Syracuse with Adam and Abbey at Pastabilities! Ha...we cleared it up at least before she got there when she text me to say she was 20 min away how long would it take me to get there (cause I had been sitting waiting for my mom to make a quick stop-by!)

Anyhow, she arrived 2-ish pastabilities in tow. Oh yeah, I'm a pig so I had her pick me up and entire loaf of their Italian bread :) Abigail was sleeping soundly that afternoon in her little afternoon coma...even when my neighbor Erin stopped by with her daughter Abby whose 8, Abigail did not wake up as they were holding her.


Adam woke up and we convinced Aunt Tammy to take him for a walk. He was so cute, walking down the stairs as he looked behind him to make sure mom was securely waiting at his house. When they got back, he kept going up and down the stairs until mean mommy put a stop to it...ha!


After a mini-meltdown from being tired and being told no, Tammy took Adam to Boscoe's where Adam was so happy to get out...

Todd text me to tell me he was going to be late...good timing as Tammy was able to stay and hold Abigail while I did Adam's bedtime routine. She left 8:30ish because I had to feed Abbey and then pass out...Todd didn't get home until 12:30am which hadn't happened in months and months. He was sitting waiting for guys to get back after fixing the same line over and over on a truck...

Wednesday, March3...Abigail's First Dr. Visit

I remember Adam's first doctor's visit...how nervous I was to take him anywhere...Todd coming home to drive us...not sure if I was ready to leave the house. This time, I was so much more confident and laid back. Todd couldn't go with us as he had to come home and sit with Adam...who went to sleep late so Todd just ran Butlerville from the kitchen table.

The doctor's office is literally three blocks away...right on the edge of Fort Ontario. Dr. Christina Liepke is my doctor, Adam's doctor and now Abbey's. Her husband is a pediatrician and saw Abigail in the hospital. We like them both but they are the stereotypical straight-laced white really smart they have to figure out how to relate to the rest of us doctor-types with two young boys of their own. Her sense of humor is so dry you can't even tell he's joking and I think he's too smart to joke..! Ha

I made the nurse let me take her photo...convinced I can't be the first mom to do that.

Abigail is a really good baby..until she's hungry. She let it loose and started YELLING as the nurse was handling her...she went there hungry and she had enough. So, I had to take a "nursing" break just so she wouldn't burst an artery. Ha ten minutes and my girl calmed down...I understand her...a good meal calms me down, too.

Abbey was weighedin at 8 lbs 2 oz...and was "shorter" at 20 inches (nurse says it happens it all time her measurement is different..um her and the hospital may want to collaborate on this!! Healthy in every way. No ill affects from the diabetes I worked so hard to control. :)

Adam Gets Stuck

On Thursday, I was the doing the dishes and I hear Adam start to cry behind me. Now, he cries a little bit more often since I brought Abigail home...to get my attention. I turned around and couldn't see what hat happened. He was lying on his stomach underneath the plastic shelves. He's always messing around down there, so I couldn't figure it out. I tried to lift him up, but I couldn't. I got down on the floor...and realized he gotten his thumb stuck in a pipe that sticks out of the floor where a dryer used to go. Poor kid! It was funny...but I felt so bad for him. I helped him pull it out and kissed it....such an Adam things to do!

Todd Goes to Indiana

Todd left at 10:30 this morning to go to Anderson, Indiana to buy two used garbage trucks. This is a ten-hour trip that Adam and I took with him in February and March 2009 (we spent a romantic Valentine's Day with two of his drivers :)...but this time, we knew it would be too much to take restless curious Adam and newborn Abigail on such a trip when at least two other drivers would have to go, too.

Besides the hospital, this is the first night we've spent a apart since we started shacking up and one of only four since our second date! I know, we are sappy, but I miss him. But I know it's for the best he go...when he had some broken trucks while I was in the hospital, it was very stressful as he didn't have any back-ups. And without trucks, there's no business. And the family business keeps the family going!

This morning, Todd took us to breakfast at Wade's before he left...it was nice to spend some time together before he had to go It was the first time I loaded both kids up and got in the car...I took it all in stride.

After we said good-bye in the parking lot (me taking a 'big-girl' pill), I didn't want to go home...so I decided to take my kids to Babies-r-us as our first 'outing'. Hey, if either one loses it, it's the ideal store. Abbey slept all the way through breakfast and all the way there and right until we went through the line. So...I ended up nursing in the parking lot. Yep. Classy. Adam kept laughing the backseat...could he know what was going on??

Adam was so tired...he fights sleep as you all know...but on the way back...he was calmly staring at Abbey with his heavy, sleep leaded eyes. Really taking her in for the first time...without his frantic attempts to tough her, grab her, tickle her. I was really touched by how intense he was about it...and then he fell asleep...his head cocked to the side like when he was a baby, his curls wild from his happy trip OUT of the house.

So...I just juggled the evening which is hard around here as it is the only time of day that Abbey wants a lot of attention and Adam has a schedule that helps him relax. He just cried going to sleep, which made me feel bad. I know he's overtired as he only napped just a bit in the car...so I didn't go get him right away. It's hard. But I did it.

Adam's Cups

Last night after I put Adam to bed I walked into the dining room and saw that Adam had taken all three sippy cups he had stashed from the day and set them up on his little stool we put in front of the dining room window so he could look out. It really stopped me...that is such a big boy thing to do!

I asked Todd if he had seen what his son had been up to....Todd told me that he had given him the third cup when he gave him dinner while I laid down for a bit...not realizing he had two others already. Apparently, Todd had then seen Adam line them all up on his Thomas the train. Sometime after, he had switched them to the stool...(Pic coming).

Tuesday, March 2...Beth & Bri

Bethany brought Brianna over on Tuesday, March 6 to visit Abigail. I've known Bethany for years, even before we moved across the street in 1987, and she is a baby whisperer! Babies and kids, even cats, always like her. She babysat all through high school, rich beyond the rest of us...she even babysat my siblings on occasion.

Adam always liked Bethany...but this time, he snubbed his girl Bethany for Brianna. The new love of his life, I think! He started climbing on her and following her around. He brought her a book to read to him and through himself at her for a hug...something I had never seen him do before! When she was sitting on the dining room chair, he tried to climb up her, almost knocking her over! (he's 32 pounds she's 45!) He even brought her some of his favorite toys.

Meanwhile, he let Bethany hold Abbey. And Abbey slept the whole time, cuddling right into Bethany. She may have lost Adam's adoration...but little Abigail was happy to take his place.

And Bethany was nice enough to bring us two meals...rigatoni with homemade sauce and meatballs (saying she was a bit nervous about cooking Italian for an Italian...but she did fine!) and chicken enchiladas...something I've actually been meaning to try and make. They were pretty good...different! Anyhow, fed us to dinners and two lunches...nice to not have to worry about food. Fitting dinner in around the craziness that is our evening is still the biggest challenge for me....

The First Weekend Home

On Saturday, February 27, Todd's Dad and stepmother Kathy came by to see Abigail...both excited for another grandchild. For Todd's father, it had been seventeen years between his last grandchild and the birth of Adam. At 85, Charlie still gets around pretty good and loves kids! After having Adam, people visiting right after was really stressful as I was getting used to breastfeeding. But I am happy to report, I am less uptight and better at nursing...so I was able to enjoy her early visitors better.


Of course, Grandma brought a box full of clothes for Abbey!

Later that day, my brother Bobby stopped by...he was a little afraid to hold her but we sat him down and put him in her arms. He's actually a natural...



As all hell had broke loose at Butlerville on Friday, Todd had to go to the yard on Sunday. He had offered to watch the kids while I went and got myself breakfast at Wade's, but I didn't want to go to our breakfast place alone...

So Todd took Adam with him to the yard and to breakfast afterwards at Dahl's in Scriba with Terry Potter, Todd's work wife and fix-it guy. I fed Abigail and tried to do some picking up as we had discovered that Adam is even more destructive when I'm nursing...so more Adam proofing had to be done! I was going to text Todd and ask him for some Dunkin', but never got around to it. But he came home with an omelette for me...I was starving and tired and it tasted so good...

OK, so I had a minor flip-out regression a few minutes later when I saw his niece Holly and her boyfriend Ron pulled up and I had yet to shower. I hate seeing people or doing anything before I shower usually, but being all post-just had a baby, it bothered me even more. But after a brief flip-out, I pulled myself together. Abbey was fast asleep, so Holly and Ron hung out in the dining room for an hour or so waiting...they went to lunch at Garafolo's (Todd asking them to get us milk so I'd have an excuse to hop in the shower) I got to shower and they came back. And Adam was excited to have visitors when he woke up. I was so tired, but less flustered then after Adam was born.

Holly was so excited to see Abigail Marie (Marie is also her middle name), I was happy to have her come back. She always talks about having kids, but her boyfriend is a little more reluctant, so she always says our kids are her closest thing!



The weekend ended with Todd hearing one of his trucks was fixed...taking some of the pressure off of him as he had enough trucks to do his runs Monday...

Abigail slept a lot, which shocked us and scared us a little...after having Adam--the no nap wonder, we kept checking to see if she was breathing. However, sleeping in her bassinet hasn't happened yet...every time she goes in it, she wakes up. So she sleeps in her car seat.. We spent that week and most of the week after that sleeping in the living room with her carseat on the ottoman just inches from my face on the couch so I could keep checking to see if she were alive (I said my neurosis got better, not that it went away!!!). She got up a couple times a night to eat, something that kept me up most of the night anyhow.

When Todd went to work Monday morning, I was more prepared than I thought I'd be. I was worried about Adam's meltdowns when I nursed, but I dealt with them one at time. And at least by Monday he had stopped trying to smack her head!!!

Friday, February 26...Abigail Goes Home

Friday began with Abigail finally going to sleep at 5:30am ..watching the 5am news, I knew from the weather my parents may not make it to our house in time. I was right...at 7:30ish I got a picture from Todd of Adam sitting at his desk with a ba-ba looking at the computer. My parents live in bum-fudge and it took them a long time to dig out...they picked Adam up at Butlerville 9-ish.

I showered and waited for the doctor to come by again and for Abigail to wake up...Dr. Liepke the pediatrician had stopped by the morning before and assured me that her health was good...no affects on her respiratory system from the gestational diabetes and from the Strep B i apparently had percolating in my system. When he came by around 9, he assured me all was well, but I would have to wait until 3:30pm to leave as it was officially 48 hours after birth. And that was the rule if they are exposed to Strep B. Then a nurse told me I could leave and after much back and fourth, with Todd waiting to hear when he was supposed to get me, it was established that I would have to wait.

It was a long day and when Todd arrived around 2pm, I was ready to go even though it was early. Hey, what were they going to do, stop me? After a half-miserable nurse got us discharged, we were headed out the door...me forcing Todd to let me take a picture (he has learned its best not to fight it, I'll get my shot!!!). They wouldn't let me go out the entrance Todd parked at (I can't stand policies for the sake of having them...) so the nurse walked me and Abbey to wait at the "main entrance" while Todd brought the car around.

The sun was shining and it felt like I had been in the hospital forever. As we drove across the bridge, Todd fielding phone calls as every truck seemed to break on him that day, I found myself so anxious to see Adam. As we turned onto 6th St., I felt a well of emotion I hadn't expected. Todd told me to wait for him so he could see Adam's face, but I misheard him and started running toward the front door. But he caught up and we walked in together.

Adam was in his room being changed by my mom, who appeared to be oblivious that we were waiting in the living room as she took what seemed to be forever...then Adam saw us and tried to jump up well the diaper was half on. I went over and picked him...he started talking fast and hard and wanted to get down. He started running all around the house telling me at the top of his lungs everything that happened (I think that's what he was doing!). He could not be stopped!


My parents left and eventually Adam figured out there was another baby there. She slept the first couple hours at home having been lulled to sleep by the short car ride...exhausted probably from her lack of sleep in the hospital. Anyhow, Adam started crying and climbing on me the first time I nursed her...he did show some love to her later that night as he thrust his sippy cup towards her well she sat in her carseat.

It felt good to be home and although the nurse said not to lift up anything bigger than my newborn, Adam had other ideas. I gave him his bath and he was happy to have his mommy at his beck and call again :) Todd told me that Adam didn't want him to do all the things I usually do with him while he was in the bath earlier in the week...playing with his toys, reading The Rainbow Fish. Although I had wanted Adam to be as happy as he could while I was gone, it was nice to know (because I'm human!) that Adam likes some things with just his Mommy :) And I was so glad I didn't have surgery as it would have made the transition so much harder if I had had to heal from that.

I was exhausted and sore but it felt like our home was how it was always meant to be...and I was so happy to be with my whole family in our home.

And Then....

They put me in the bathtub while they cleaned up my delivery room and got ready to transfer me. On our way through, Todd's niece Jennifer who happens to work there was waiting to see us...I was not thrilled as I had just pushed a kid at, but at the same time I appreciated her interest and support.

Abigail was in the nursery getting the once over...Todd came back and told me he got the thumbs up from the nurse on our daughter's blood sugar. Having been diagnosed with gestational diabetes, this was good news! Todd stayed for a bit then had to get home so my parents could leave...we were both admiring our girl. Before he left, I let him choose her middle name. Marie is my mother's middle name and his niece Holly's middle name...Holly is very important to Todd-after us and his dad, she is his "person".

My parents came over on their way home...excited to hold their first granddaughter. They were supposed to bring me chocolate chip cookies and an apple...since I could eat them now...but they forgot :)

Abbey slept from like 9pm to 3am...tired out from all her work I guess! I took a shower and tried to sleep...my back hurt so much I actually took a tylenol with percocet....it only allowed me to nap a little...later good old-fashioned motrin did the trick.

On Thursday, apparently we got the storm of the season....it kept Todd's parents from coming out but they sent me a basket of flowers. Travis and Cory Bliss, who run Bliss Disposal and are friends of Todds also sent me flowers. Best part, of course, is that they came with balloons and I knew exactly who would appreciate those :)

Deidrinelle stopped by, but they wouldn't let her past the front desk...I peeked out and got scolded by the nurse..I told her I understood the policy, but no one had informed me previously that visitors weren't allowed due to the swine flu.

There was a baby boom that day...all 5 delivery rooms were full...and the nurses were busy enough to forget me...but that was OK...I had my own room, unlike at Crouse!

I got homesick and was ready to see Todd by the time he got there after 3pm. He couldn't stay long as my parents wanted to get home before dark. My mom ran in on her way home to give me my cookies (which no longer tasted as good...must be a mental thing).

Abbey didn't sleep too well in the hospital. She didn't like sleeping in the bassinet but preferred to be held. Different than her big brother!

I was happy to start to get to know my little girl...but by then I was missing Adam something awful!

Wednesday, February 24, 2010...Princess Abigail Arrives at 3:36pm.

I woke up that morning half-groggy and out of it from the Ambien and the emotion. I suddenly felt overwhelmed and like crying...the nurse hit it on the head when she said that it was hard because we had come to the hospital expecting to have a baby and more than 24 hours later...we didn't. They gave me an anti-nasuea medication (phenergan)that ended up making me nap (when they offered, I didn't refuse...I had thrown up during my labor with Adam and it makes things worse...just ask Todd, he got covered once). I woke up feeling less "hungover" and less sad.

The plan was to break my water and see how things progressed from there and if need be administer another drug in the IV to get the contractions moving. The midwife who had taken over for Dr. Coty (intially I was disappointed I was losing the dr. because I liked him, but I ended up liking her) said we'd have a baby by ten tonight. Todd, being Todd, said "How about by 4pm"? and she counter-offered with five.

The rest of the day, I think this is what happened...I may have screwed up the order a little, I was in pain and a little high :)

It turned out that once my water was broken, things started moving pretty fast...because it had been so hard to monitor her heartbeat with the stomach monitor, they put a little clip on top of her skull in-utereo. I was supposed to get into a chair and get on my hands on knees to help rotate her a little bit better, but as my contractions came on strong, her heartbeat differential wasn't as good as they liked. They also put a contraction up me that was able to better gauge the contractions. Some of that was lost on me at the time, but they had me get on my side...which for me was incredibly painful and was hard to stomach...but once Todd explained to me that being on my back was compressing a vein and causing her problems, I was able to curb my panic at being in so much pain.

I was dilated to 5 cm and I asked about pain medication options and the window for an epidural. Todd says I said "I think I want that IV drug now". Sounds like me!! Anyhow, she told me that stadol could be given in my IV and would take the "edge" off the top of the mountain of pain. And an epidural had to be administered before 7cm dilated. I liked what the midwife said next. She said "if that is your choice". I said "I choose the stadol". There's so much mixed emotion and message about pain medication during birth, I appreciated they way it was put. I said "I choose Cytol".

When having Adam, I had had an epidural that didn't take...I was numb but I could still feel the pain. It was awful. I also hated when they put the catheter in my spine to administer it. We ended up waiting for it to wear off and I pushed him out. That and because I didn't want to do anything else to delay the arrival of our little girl led to my decision.

But I had to wait until they got our daughter's heartbeat regulated. I didn't fully understand at the time as my contractions were so painful until Todd re-explained it to me. When they gave it to me, it was exactly like Kathy had said. It took the peak off the pain and that's how I mentally got myself through the next couple of hours telling myself "it could be worse". That...and Todd being there for me by my side. He talked me through the worst and helped me focus on not being scared. He said later it was so much better than Crouse because Oswego respected our experience...whereas the nurses at Crouse kind of stepped in and did the coaching. I was better able to curb my panic at the pain this time...partly because of this different experience...but I wouldn't have been able to put it into words until Todd did for me the other day. Also, we both agreed we didn't feel as "pushed"...less of a baby factory.

I think around 3pm the drug seemed to wear off and I was ready to try something else or more...I thought I had hours left to go...but they checked me out and I was 9cm. The baby was ready. And I admit..I started to lose my composure...I said "I wish I had taken more pain medication" and the nurse Jeanette said..."Almost every woman says that now". But it didn't matter...the baby had other ideas. The last couple of contractions Todd thought I was holding my breath, but my gut was literally holding itself in as our daughter decided to try and get out.

I had pushed for two hours at that point with Adam and said something to the effect of I didn't think I can handle two more hours..and the nurse said "you won't"! And I said, "Promise not two hours?" She did and boy, was she right, it only took like ten minutes. I couldn't stop pushing. I didn't hear her cry initially because I pushed her too far and they couldn't squigie her nose and mouth (Todd told me this later). And there she was..beautiful with lots of hair..

It was 3:36pm on February 24, 2010 when Abigail Maire Butler entered the world at 8lbs 11oz. The midwife guessed when she handed her to the neonatal nurse she was 8 pounds...she didn't and still doesn't feel like her weight. She's all girl...dare I say delicate?

Todd cut the cord and teased me that I didn't need to see the placenta again (I had insisted at Adam's birth...hey I was curious!). Proud papa taking her picture...me holding her...Todd texting everyone...with that smile on his face...it was over and to be honest, it wasn't fun...but it wasn't the traumatic experience I had with Adam.

Todd asked me what her name was. I asked her if she wanted to be an Abigail or a Rachel...she made a little funny face when I said Rachel...so Abigail it was. It suited her head of dark hair and little delicate nose...and Daddy said right away...you look like Mommy! I think she does, too, but I don't think I'm THAT cute....