Thurday, May 6 We Finally Make Joe's Crab Shack

There is a Joe's Crab Shack in Greeneville, SC...so we gathered up Bonnie, April, Jordan and Peyton and drove the 20 minutes or so and there it was. It stood there surrounded by its fake docks in all it's glory. Todd got his steam bucket as did April and Bonnie and they enjoyed every bite. Jordan and I bought platters and enjoyed those, too. Adam and Peyton did pretty good and poor Abbey had a freak out after sitting there smiling a half hour or so but felt better after a little burp. I got Adam a t-shirt that says I'm crabby like my daddy :) and Abbey a tie-dyed onesie that says my first Joe's Crab Shack. Usually Todd thinks that stuff is a waste of money, but he secretly loved the shirt, too. We went to April's house afterwards, a cute and neat ranch three bedrooms and two baths. She had room all ready for us if we wanted to stay but we were ready to start the trip home though it was almost ten pm...Todd wanted to get home to his Dad, so I decided to skip the day it would take to have dinner with my sisters and we decided we'd try to go down later that year. We drove a couple of hours and stayed and a brand spanking new motel 6...got up the next morning and drove the ten/eleven hours home, stopping at a Shoney's for breakfast buffet...a purely southern experience at six dollars and change. :) It was so nice to get home that Friday night. Todd had missed our weekly NY Pizza order, so we got one to eat after kids were in bed.:)

Charles Lewis Butler

Very early Friday morning, May 28, the phone rang at about 1:30am. I was awake on the couch with Abbey...Todd asleep on the loveseat. I had a feeling it was bad news as his father had taken a turn for the worse and I had gone to see him that afternoon to basically say good-bye.

It was his wife Kathy, Todd's stepmother and Charlie's companion of 20 years. She told me he was gone and I gave the phone to Todd. It was all surreal. Todd got up and went to work and I brought the kids to see him later. It's like little kids know...he didn't want his father out of his sight. Todd went to walk out the door and Adam flipped out. Eventually, Todd got in the car with us and we drove around and let him out after a bit to minimize Adam getting sad. It worked...mostly.

For Todd, I can only imagine. For me, it's like something is missing. When Todd and I became "official", the first thing he wanted to do was introduce me to his dad. We met at dinner for Canale's and I dumped my glass of red wine all over him. He made a joke...like father, like son, always making me laugh. Todd went to the bathroom or something and Charlie leaned in and said "Todd's a good man". And I said "I know".

He told me later before we got married he was glad Todd had me and Adam...that he was the happiest he had ever seen him. I told Charlie I was glad he raised such a responsible, hard-working and caring son who takes such good care of us. In typical Charlie style, he said that he couldn't take credit...it was all Todd's mom's doing. That he takes credit for Todd being mean and miserable, just like him. :)

Charles Lewis Butler...May 29, 1926 - May 28, 2010. He almost made his goal of being 86 to become the oldest living Butler...

Thursday May 6//Bonnie's House

Todd's sister Bonnie has a house that one could say is incomplete. The walls in the living room are plywood as Bonnie explained to me...her husband took off the Sheetrock and keeps asking her what kind of paneling she wants but she refuses to answer because she wants him to redo their bedroom first.:) Sounds like my parents!! It's tiny, a two-bedroom, with Travis, Jordan & Peyton in one room with their big dog in a cage. They are building a house, which we got to see on our way there. It's cute, end of cul-de-sac in a modest subdivision. Anyhow, I met Joe on his way out to work...and Abbey needed to be fed. I sat in the Tahoe feeding her while Peyton and Adam started up. April was there too, with her dig May and she LOVES kids and wants her own...but no real prospects now. So she was playing with them...and loves it!
Abbey went to sleep in her seat on Bonnie's bed and I started what ended in my surrender trying to keep Adam away from their dog on his chain. He had a lot of pent up energy and when him and May met, they would nip. I was worried Adam would get caught in the middle. But Adam wanted that DEEE so bad...more than May probably because I said no...! They have a yard, just how I picture a redneck yard....trees, dirt driveway, grass, truck on blocks. But Adam doesn't get much chance to run outside so he loved it!!
All afternoon, he ran around with Peyton, his cheeks flushed and his head sweaty. I wish I had taken pictures of it! Climbing up and down the porch where Bonnie, April, Jordan, Todd, me and April's now adult foster daughter Mandie and her husband sat. Peyton was even drinking out of the bird bath, but mean me drew the line there!!! Peyton took a bath and streaked through the yard :) Eventually Jordan put him in for a nap and I gave Adam a bath. He was so tired, but happy!
Peyton sleeps in bed with his parents, so Jordan left their door open so he can get out when he wakes up. I shut the door so Adam wouldn't wake him up and when he did get up, he accidentally locked himself in trying to get out. It wasn't funny but it was...Todd eventually helped them get the doorknob off.:)
Bonnie got home from work after Abbey was sleeping and wanted to hold her when she woke up...so showed me some family pictures while Adam and Peyton ran around...Adam loved their little slide and made his first basket!!! It's nice to see how much fun he has with his 2nd cousin.
Next stop...Joe's Crab Shack!!

Thursday, May 6//South Carolina IHOP

We left Atlanta around 10am...Todd still wanted a good breakfast (yeah, Tammy, looking for a Denny's!). But somehow both our kids fell asleep right away so we didn't stop..not that we saw a Denny's. We were on our way to see Todd's sister Bonnie, her husband Joe, her daughter April and son Travis. And Travis's son Peyton and baby mama Jordan in Belton, South Carolina. Travis called about two hours into the three hour ride and ended up convincing Todd to forgo Denny's and go to IHOP. Him, Jordan and Peyton (who is two months older than Adam met us there. Abbey wanted to be fed as they got there, but it was OK as service was Molasses slow! And Peyton has a way of taking over a table. Last summer when they visited and he was 11 months old, we soon learned that Peyton Lane Purdy had a very special and unique screech! This thing pierced the sound barrier! Bonnie said that as a baby, Jordan and her mother would give Peyton whatever he wanted when he did it, so of course he kept it up. And he still does this. Hey, I don't judge as being a mom is hard enough, let alone an 18 year old mama. But Oh my, it's ear splitting. The good news is, he does it a lot less! But Adam was eyeing him and wanting to stand up in the booth like Peyton. I informed him in the best impression of my mother that if he did that, I would have no problem taking him to the car and sitting there with him. It seemed to work after a couple of times!!

But Adam and Peyton had a lot of fun together the previous summer so I hoped he would again.

Abbey was still fussy when I brought her in, but Jordan was able to calm her down...she was in her heaven as she wanted a little girl and still wants one :) I love this photo of Jordan giving Peyton her MOM face while cuddling Abbey.

After a so-so breakfast (sorry Todd!), we followed Travis to his Mama's house 40 minutes away.

Wednesday May 5///Alligator, Yak & Buffalo Oh My!

After the Aquarium they all fell asleep one by one and when everyone was awake, we decided dinner needed to be an event....we weren't up for looking for Joe's as we had had seafood at Red Lobster, so we combed the city and tourist guides that were in the hotel.

Todd had said for some time that he'd like to go to an exotic steakhouse where they serve odd meats. Certainly not the kind of thing you can find in Central New York...we found a place called Saskatoon but the online review was mixed, saying the food was fine but the restaurant was empty...well, we didn't care about that...less people to bother with our crying kids! No one answered when we called, so we picked a back-up...Gladys Knight's Chicken and Waffles...which we had seen profiled on Man vs. Food...but they answered at 5pm so we headed over.

It was in a swanky neighborhood. And it was completely empty. The waiter and waitress very attentive...but it looked fine enough. So we stayed...we ordered alligator bites for Adam and a wild game appetizer platter. Tammy will be shocked to know I tried everything...gator, buffalo, venison and ostrich. I didn't really like it...but Todd and I said we were going try everything new!!! Adam tried gator and buffalo and then wasn't interested. I have to say, the gator was chewy and the other ones were "gamey". For our entrees, Todd ordered Yak...which I tried and I liked it best of the meats. I ordered Mahi-mahi...something I'd never had and I really liked it. They had said Yak was really lean....but, Todd thought it was fatty. I think he liked Gator bites (the bigger pieces weren't as chewy) best. Adam did enjoy the spinach dip that came with the appetizer.

The owner came over to ask how everything was....he was dressed in a suit. We asked him why business is so slow...they were open only a few months and he said their clientele were the types who went home, worked out and went out to dinner late.

Adam started to have a meltdown and the waitress was able to scrounge up some milk and he sucked it up, happy. Then Abbey started and we got the bill...Yak cost like $36!! Haha big city prices? Or just exotic meat prices?? HA I saved the receipt for scrapbooking purposes Tammy!!!

I hope they pick up business, it's really something different. We left and went back to the hotel, content that we had had a one of a kind big city experience!!! If you know me, you know how picky I am about meat...so this was an adventure for me:)

And it was fun to drive around a neighborhood and get a feel for the upper middle class atlantianits!! And we stopped at a CVS to get some milk haha

Wednesday, May 6///The Atlanta Aquarium

Wednesday we woke up and headed down the hill to the Atlanta Aquarium, allegedly the largest in the world. I was looking forward to seeing Adam's reaction to the animals...as he loved the zoo and always loves animals in general. And we had figured out that Abbey's car seat fit into the double stroller, making life more comfortable for her!

It was busy, but not insane (unlike the price...over $60 for the two us...fortunately under 3 is free!!). The first thing you see when you walk in to your right is a cross-section window where penguins were swimming. Love at first sight for Adam!!! I lifted him up and he was touching the glass...an d the penguins were tapping back with their bills. He was smiling and saying "hi! Hi!" in that cute high voice he has for animals and things he loves (abbey, balloons). I knew I had been right...this was the place for Adam!

He loved everything...the tanks he could run up to particularly and really look into. And the tanks that were over our head in the river area he was so busy trying to see he was tipping his whole body back trying to look up :)

We went through most of the exhibits...I loved the beautiful Beluga whale and we all loved the tunnel that went under the aquarium with all sorts of animals and several kinds of sharks. That was Todd's favorite part.

We ate the most expensive and crappy lunch ever though, there. It was $28 and the mini-pizza I got was even disgusting. Adam wouldn't even eat the chicken strips!!! On the way out, I picked up two Christmas ornaments as we don't have but a few and I've deicded that when we travel that's what I'll get. It covers getting a souvenir with picking up stuff we don't need and we'll have a memorable tree!!

We left afterwards and debated on taking the kids up to the expo, but Adam starting having a meltdown so it was nap time! He actually was adapting very well to being out of his surroundings and out of his schedule, but I didn't want to push him anymore.

And Abbey started objecting, too. :)

The Hunt for Joe's Crab Shack....Chapter 1

So we ended that crazy first day in Atlanta in the Tahoe looking for a Joe's Crab Shack. For months, they have been advertising locally and Todd has said how good the food looks. But...there aren't any ANY where near here (why do advertisers do that??). So...we looked it up before we left and yes, there were several Atlanta locations. But hey, in the age of Internet access and GPS, it never occurred to us to right down the information.

We struggled with Internet access that first day in the hotel...and so I decided to go old-fashioned. I pulled out the phone book on the closest area shelf and ripped out the page with Joe's on it...(hey who else is going to use that book in this day and age??)and figured I'd ask one of the desk employee for help. Yeah bad idea. The clerk was like um, I'm not from here and those kind of chain restaurants aren't downtown. The security guy tried to be helpful saying something like "Just get on 85 for like 30 minutes and you'll see it right there". So...I programmed an address into the Garmin...but I should've known something was up 'cause it sent me to an address one number away from what I punched in. I braved driving Atlanta highways (Todd was still sweating off his cocktails), nearly driving into a ditch once but other than that doing OK...and we ended up at a park. Yeah. Not right. Turns out that the phone book didn't specifically list towns. Or fully list them. I figured out another abbreviation ...one for Marietta, another suburb. We programmed that in. Oh, and we were almost out of gas. We stopped at a gas station, but it was closed. I didn't realize we didn't get gas...and when the chime started going off on our way to this new address, I panicked a little. Todd was like it's fine, it's fine, but all I could picture was me on the side of a major highway with two kids and Todd unable to drive...but he was right...

So we get off the highway and make a bad turn...get gas...then...we start searching for this elusive Joe's Crab Shack. And this time, we found it.
Dark.
Closed.
That's right ..closed...so I'm getting anxious...my kids are tired it's like 8pmish and now I'm driving in a strange city in the dark. And, for me, the ever present threat of having to whip it out for Abbey. So,of course, spousal bickering begins...we end up pulling into Red Lobster...I calm down...Todd sobers up and we laugh at ourselves later that night. Adam was tired so Todd let him sit in the booth and eat from his salad plate until his food. And when Abbey started crying, Todd rocked her and she was OK. Once again, I ask myself, why did I get so worried about nothing? When Todd tells me not to worry, I'm like how can I not? Then later, I'm like, you're right, what was I so worked up about? But don't tell him...he doesn't need to know I think he was right :)

Back to the hotel and finally, bedtime. Adam passed out and Abbey, too...and us as well!

Adam and Me...Sick

Adam is lying on the couch for the first time in that kid sick set-up...pillows, blankey,cup and bottle. Every once in a while he does a little whine-cry. I wish I could cuddle him all day, but Abbey is refusing to be put down this afternoon. When I was holding him earlier and she started to cry, I told him mommy loved hugging him, but his sister was crying. He got a little upset, but then he let me go. I know it wasn't in my head...my 18 month old son was showing compassion...

We're on our third Shrek movie now and Adam is lethargic, but showing some signs of life after Tylenol...I think he has the same sucky head cold I do. Being a mom though, my own misery I almost forget when my little boy feels it. Even Bailey felt bad, curling up on Adam's feet for the first time. Though my little control freak had to pull his foot out...not wanting to be confined.

Day Two Part Two in Atlanta...May 3rd

So Todd comes back from the Expo close to five...there's a cocktail reception that one of the major haulers Todd does accounts for from 5-7pm. He was hot and tired and his legs hurt, but I encouraged him to head back...hobknobbing is important!!! We walked him a couple of blocks then through Olympic park back to the Congress Convention Center, testing out our double stroller for the first time...liked it right away. We had to go down this huge hill...Todd worried I'd have a hard time getting back up...more on that in a minute :)

But we made arrangements for us to pick him up with the Tahoe when it was over, so I wandered through Olympic park for a bit (Atlanta was the site of the 1996 Olympics). It's gorgeous, right in the heart of downtown Atlanta. There's this cool fountain in the shape of the rings that kids can run in and out of and play in...except for the few times a day there is a coordinated water/lights/music show. I happened to be there in time for one. Adam got his I'm curious so I'm absorbing this serious face so we watched for a bit...but it was too much for Abbey, who woke up. They were both HOT so I put water on their faces and headed back. We passed a playground built to be accessible for all types of kids and they had these big swings that were like chairs. I put Adam in it and he was tired and hot and miserable BUT I got him to crack a grin :) Then I pushed it too high and he gave me a grunt and I knew it was time to move on...but it was his first ride in a swing!!

Time to push ourselves up that hill. Ok, Started out not too bad...then it got harder...then I had to take a short rest. OK I finally made it, tired and old feeling. I waited for the light to change and crossed the street at the crosswalk..and three quarters of the way across, I somehow missed a GIANT pothole, tripped, twisted my ankle, falling. The stroller tipped backwards and all I could see was my babies' heads hitting the pavement. I didn't even feel the pain that later (and still) hurts. Two women ran to help me and another man ran up the hill. I could hear the traffic at the stop light...but everyone stayed where they were. I picked up the stroller literally and carried it...call it mommy adrenaline!! The only one bleeding was me..I was crying, Adam was whimpering and Abbey....was smiling. One of the woman tried to help me with her first aid kit, but couldn't get it open. I limped up to the hotel. I talked to Todd who I still had to get...who had consumed more than his share of cocktails...but he ended up walking back despite his sore and hot legs...I was shaken but still set on dinner...and that's another story!! pics coming...

Pause From Atlanta...Mother's Day and Getting Abbey to Take a Bottle!!!

I've been trying to get Abbey to take a bottle and it's been a hard challenge. She cries so hard, though she has made a little progress showing she can suck. Today Adam had had enough of her crying and gave her his bottle. Then he hugged her, patting her back like we do and kissed her all over the face. It was so sweet...

And speaking of sweet, we had a low-key Mother's Day, still recovering from our trip AND I have no real desire to go to a restaurant on the busiest restaurant day of the year...but Daddy helped Adam make my first homemade card...green highlighter on white paper. And I loved it. And being Oswego, NY it had snowed...so Todd suggested we go over to Rudy's to get some lunch. Perfect idea.

We also went to see Todd's Dad at Seneca Hill Manor, but unfortunately Abbey and I could only stay a bit as she started FLIPPING out. She wouldn't even eat at first when we got to the car, but I realized that she was so hot from getting worked up so finally some airconditioning helped. But on my way to the car in the elevator, people were giving me disapproving looks. Not the first time. This woman said to me...don't you have her hat? I said no, her dad has it. Then she said, can't you give her a bottle? I said, no she won't take it. More disapproval. I said "We're working on it." Then instantly was pissed at myself for feeling the need to explain anything to these people!

We dropped Todd off at the office so he get get a look at all the catching up he had to do and ended up picking him up a few hours later as the yard bitch he had expected to stop by hadn't come when we talked. Todd asked me if I wanted dinner, but we decided to go to PJ's. He said not Coldstone? And I said no, we went to PJ's last Mother's Day. And he said...so it's a tradition. And I liked the way he said it. I dreamed of making family traditions for a long time, let alone Mother's Day...and I said, Yes, It's a Tradition. :)

Day 2/Last Tuesday/We Arrive

So we wake up last Tuesday and pack up the car, deciding to look for a Denny's between there and Atlanta to get something more substantial to eat. But the only freaking thing in the south appears to be Waffle Houses everywhere! The kids drifted off to sleep surprisingly so Todd left it up to me to stop...I was so tired and so hungry, so we pulled off and went to a Waffle House. Adam started a rare restaurant meltdown making me regret my decision for a minute, but the waitresses were so friendly....everyone had the southern accent, of course. The food was kind of weak....particularly the waffles! So a southern experience we probably won't repeat :)

We thought we pulled into pre-city slow moving traffic, but fortunately it was just an accident...and traffic into Atlanta around noon wasn't bad at all. We found our Days Inn fairly easily...just one wrong turn...good thing Todd has learned to trust my sense of direction to get us back :) The lady gave Todd a hard time about checking in so early until he pulled the I have two babies card and they let us in....

We loaded up the cart with all our stuff...and let me tell you, Todd gets Super Dad points for this...when I got into the Tahoe the day before and looked back as we pulled out, I saw Abbey's swing in the back. I had said the night before...gee Abbey loves her swing so much when she's got a fussy tummy it's the only thing that makes her smile too bad we can't take it with us...not thinking we actually could. But there it was. I couldn't believe it...it was an example of one of the things I fell in love with about Todd. He doesn't say to himself ever no, we can't do that. He says WTF why can't we do it? Let's figure it out. And at the very least, we've tried.

Anyhow, let me tell you...Abbey got right into that swing after all that time in her carseat and grinned ear to ear (Thanks, Aunt Tammy...we know it was a gift for Adam and he liked it, but she LOVES it!)

Todd prepared to walk down to the expo and I got our kids to take a nap...Adam surprisingly fell asleep in his pack and play pretty easily after some Shrek 3 on the computer of course (Thank God Todd had that on his hard drive as we couldn't get the Internet up yet and his computer was rejecting the DVDs).

Part 2 of Day 2 Next Blog :)

So, Yes, We ARE Crazy...Day 1/Driving to Atlanta

On Monday morning May 3rd, we packed up the Tahoe (which Todd had had one of his yard boys scrub the sucker from top to bottom earlier in the week to meet what he calls his wife's wolf-scent standards...yes, it passed!) and headed to Atlanta Georgia for the annual Waste Management Expo, by best bet a 16 hour drive. Our goal was to make at least 12 hours of that on Monday as Todd wanted to be in Atlanta by noon time Tuesday to hit up the Expo in the afternoon. He had talked about going for months, wanting us to join him...me so nervous about traveling with an 18 month old and 2 month old, but ultimately deciding the experience of being together as a family was more than worth the potential stress.

We brought, of course, Shrek 1-3 and a couple of other DVDs as fortunately, the Tahoe is equipped with a player. Well, it's a good thing we did. We were on the road by 9:15am, with Todd having gone to the yard to get the week started while I got the stuff and kids ready. Abbey, her stomach full, was sleeping. But Adam woke up miserable. Todd put in Shrek 3 and he watched it...but when it was over, he was crying and miserable. We didn't realize at first, but the heavy downpour of rain was freaking him out, too. It made sense once I put two and two together because crying isn't usually his thing until he's really pushed to his breaking point. And it didn't occur to me at first because my son is pretty fearless. So I crammed into the back between two car seats and stayed their most of the way. We stopped twice for gas and food on the go...I know, not the healthiest, but we had BK breakfast and Mickey D's dinner as we wanted to get there as quick as possible. Most of the afternoon and evening, the A-team took turns being sad or grumpy. Between feeding Abbey (don't ask how uncomfortable that was!!) and trying to help Adam through the trip with no real nap, it got a little challenging. But thank GOD for SHREK!!! It made the trip bearable for Adam, who got so excited when we stopped for gas and Daddy walked him around to stretch his little legs.

At 10:30ish in the evening as they both were crying on either side of me I told Todd "It's time..". I just couldn't take it anymore!! I'm getting better at hearing my kids cry...but seeing their faces, Abbey with real big tears since she was born and Adam's "face collapse" is too much for me.

So we stopped at a Motel 6 in Spartansburg, SC. Adam did not travel too well on our honeymoon in October, so I was assuming the worst. But he went to sleep in his pack and play and Abbey slept in her car seat by midnight. I had pictured her crying at night and waking him up. But she didn't...she slept until 6amish when I heard her kissey noises and got to her. The night actually went well.

And the next morning, I realized that although I had gotten stressed by the end of the night, the trip went better than I had expected, too. I had spent so much time worrying about both the trip and all sleeping in the same room...and it was fine. It was the beginning of a lesson I learned all week...to loosen up and that pushing Adam out of his routine a little...and me...may be a good thing!

PS That night I put Abbey on one of the beds and turned around and she was rolled over...uncertain if Adam did it or she did....!